walang pasoookkk!! hehe! yay! there were no classes again today because of the rain so i woke up around 9-ish and played the cd kimmy gave me for friendship day. it's a cd by something nergaard called port of call and i really love it ♥. it's really good and relaxing. vey lounge-ish. very cool. anyway, i asked our maid, manang nenen, to make some hot tsokolate a.k.a. sikwati for breakfast today and it was not so good. my mom's tsokolate is still and forever will be much much much better ♥. she, my mum, usually makes the tsokolate for breakfast and toasts up some pandesal to go with it. i love dipping the pandesal in the tsokolate kase and then she cooks up some bacon or hotdog or franks or somekind of protein and also fries an egg or something. it's the best kind of egg cooking i believe. it's not sunny side up or scrambled. it's kinda in between mixed with a bit of salt. yum . my mum brewed it up again, the tsokolate and "fixed" it after seeing and hearing that i didn't like manang's version and hers (my mom) was waaayyy much much much better. yum ♥. anyway after that i watched this film, the citie of god. it was good. i love the music. and the direction(as if i know much about direction but i dunno it really seems way cool and good to me. it was... different). and it was based on a true story as well in the slums of rio de janeiro, the city if god, which is quite disturbing in a way because it's just so violent. i like bene. anyway, as the movie neared its ending, flor, the manicurista-slash-hairdresser-slash-makeuppererwhatever-masahista(masseuse->i'm unsure of the spelling so pardon me if it's wrong) dyed my hair chestnut brown. you see she dyed my mum and there was some of the dye left and i got that. my hair already was brown or some kind of shade of brown but now it's... brown-er. i dunno. i like it. kinda. hehe

the philippine media usually and pretty much sucks. it's not because of the graphics or the cinematography or whatever and the suggestive, nonpleasing -atleast to me and most of the people i know- yet catchy back ground music (those are just fine), but because of the fact that instead of promoting good will, inspiration, and using their unfortunately, very influensive power to be able to expound the knowledge and the awareness of the people of the philippines, they keep on focusing on who's with who, who got back together with who, and who's IN who. things that make the general and pretty much gullible public even more close minded and "controversy"-linked and also focus less on what really is important. i mean will our knowledge of celebrities and their so-called relationships, and newly "innovated" words be able to truly help us improve the well being of our country? or more importantly, the well being of our world? i mean, it could help you break the ice at a party or something but i mean hello.

or shall i say in more so-called hip but just so wrong term, (i so don't see WHY some people are "advertising" AND using this word but it seems like a good ending for my rant)heller...

*barfs*

anyway, we've got filipino and geometry periodical tests tomorrow. haay. you know, filipino literature, like english or whatever kind of literature, seems hard and all, but if we just really try to understand the messages the lit gives, it's really pretty much amazing. -i recommend noli me tangere. ang galing ni rizal. whaayop! ;D- it can really help the reader see things in a more... raw and "inspired" perspective. geom on the other hand... hmm.. ehehehe it's pretty much um. hehe no comment. okay lang sha i guess. pwede na. oh well, wish me luck, guys. mwah

we had sabayang eliminations today. ♥ it's this contest wherein all the classes have to participate in. it's part of our grade. the piece is entitled "Ang Mga Kagilagilalas na Pakikipagsapalaran ni Juan Dela Cruz" by Jose F. Acaba. it's a very interesting piece with lots of concepts and symbolisms. i'll put it up here sometime soon. anyway, our class did so well!! our voices were really so loud and clear and stuff (our class's voice always gets commended during church and whatevers and stuff since we always participate in the singing and dancing. heck, we sing and dance even if there is nothing to sing and dance to! our class is really like MUSICAL so hehe watch out songfest!)♥ ahh! hihihihi!! we were really great. one of my classmates suddenly slacked off but despite his annoying-ness, we pulled through and bagged... tententenenen! 5th place!! (or was that 6th? i'm not sure) we got an average of 91. and well, though we didn't get into finals and i can't help but feel disappointed since i really felt the peace and unity and stuff during the eliminations, i am still very very proud and happy. we were really good! we were pretty much all really good! sections b, c, and h are the ones who got into finals and i wish them so much love and luck! make us juniors proud! hehe! our batch is really improving nowadays in terms of batch spirit and unity. so yey! wee! i'm so excited! ♥

after the last bell my friends and i went to makati med to visit iman, our batchmate. we rode faith's carnival, the car, and we were like, i dunno, accdg. to anna, we were around 13 people squushed inside. wahhaa thank god, i sat in front with char or else i would have died in the squushness. anyway iman got his arm got broken and stuff so he had to have an operation and get all confined and stuff. -i just keep using the word 'and' and 'and stuff' don't i? haha- oh and then it turns out our other friend kako was confined too due to some lung problems (some kind of water inside whatsoever) so we went to his room too. they're both okay now so, okay! it was fun. some of us went back to school ahead and some got dropped off somewhere in makati. i went back to school along with char, bry, and lourdes. in school we saw guilio. woah! his hair is so long now. he looks better now and he told me he's gonna leave in like the next week(?) i'm not really super sure since i was too busy looking at his face, but whatever. point is he's leaving philippines soon. anyway char and i went to the production and design meeting and well, yey!! lots of the bleacher design's letters had their initial shape na. basta it's cool! we have a meeting again tomorrow which is.. ugh. so katamad due to the so relaxing cool weather manila has been recieving lately -mwah, god! i needed this ♥-. i kinda wanna just sleep all day but well i designed the bleachers and am one of the heads so i have ta go. i'll probably be there late though. i mean, i usually am.

oh by the way, manileños, check out the sky and the weather. aren't they just absolutely perfect!? i mean, especially after the rain when you can still feel the coolness and non-sticky wetness of the air and you can still smell the soft, faint smell of the rain, and then everytime the skies get clear and the sun's shine is just perfect, and yet the breeze is still so cool and soft. it's so exhilerating. everything just gets so beautiful.

Perfect Weathers:
1. sunrise when the air is still quite cool and then the sun's bright and very warm rays shine down on you. it's just so totally refreshing.
-> gets better when you're at the beach and the waters are so tranquil you can see the sand beneath it so clearly, feel the coolness of the sand and water while absorbing the wonderful, healthy rays of the sun. ♥♥ exhilirating as well! ♥♥♥
2. sunset when the sky is just filled with so much wonderful colors and the clouds are so well defined, with the warmth of the day slowly fading into the darkness. -> very relaxing.
3. (see paragraph previous to "Perfect Weathers")
4. the afternoon when the sun is very hot but its rays are not too bright, with the not-so-cool nor not-too-warm wind s blowing around. it just screams out "play in the fields of grass".

there seems to be this new issue about this could-be-implemented 2 child policy thing to control the population and once again the big mouthed and close minded, in my view, filipino roman catholic church members and conservatives are opposition. ugh. they oppose everything. anyway, i myself don't have a particular stand on the issue but i do believe that something really HAS to be done to control the fucking population. we should have more birth control shit kase eh! and the filipino masses and conservatives should be more open to the ideas and the facts. i mean when god said, go forth and multiply, how much multiplication should be done anyway? in following a certain rule or a certain knowledge of something or someone, one must take into consideration not only history, emotion/s, and the culture of the people, but also their environment.

okay, so i am already totally sleepy and tired and i still haven't even gotten through half way of reviewing my chem book and notes and english sort since we'd be given our tests tomorrow (i'll most likely continue tom morning) & all but ugh. i've just got to share these feelings and thoughts, which is strange because i really haven't been having any urge at all to make much effort to catch up and chat with my bestest of friends because all i've been REALLY talking to lately is myself, and in a way i'm starting to get tired of that. and well lately, like today at school, i've been talking to my self OUT LOUD more often. i just blurt out random thoughts and argue with myself while walking. reading. doing nothing but the reflexes given to me by god and my humanly body. like a while ago when my mom --god bless her ever so wonderful soul, i love her so holy fucking much--, delivered the cookies i needed for entre class (the orders my friends and schoolmates made). she got to school later than expected and i had a hard time looking for all the order-ers that i got so stressed and tense and all. and in math class and all of my other classes, i just kept zoning out: talking to myself in my head with some of the thoughts escaping my oh-so-deprived mouth. sometimes i think and i honestly believe that i'm talking to god or some other higher being or some other side of myself. or maybe even my subconscious (did i even spell that right?). wait. if it were my subconscious then it would no longer be my subconscious because i'm actually "recognizing" it in some kind of open way. ugh. what ever. i'm so strange right now. and i'not really sure anymore. it's strange and stressing all this thinking, yet in a some sort of non-"normal" or cliche way nice. ugh. am i making sense? ugh. don't answer that. or rather... do answer that. or not. ugh (insert something between an exclamatory? mark and a point here if there is one because that's how i would have said it). and just HOW many times have i used "ugh" in this entry? ugh. ugh!!! here i go again. ...ugh. whatever.

anyway, i want or rather i NEED Second Helpings by megan mccafferty. i've just finished sloppy firsts and now i've just GOT to know what will happen next, despite the fact that it makes me realize, even, how much i'm at loss of and how much i really desperately NEED a marcus flutie (refer to the book Sloppy Firsts if you haven't heard of him). ...a little more physically hot though maybe, since i don't and haven't ever seen marcus. i've just imagined him. i thought him to be hot in a not too really gorgeous sort of way. someone who is not really that ooh la la but has this special... "ALLURE" that makes him ooh la la -ish. i'm so attracted to him and his circumstances and whatever experiences and philosophies (actually of ms. mccafferty's most likely or someone who had inspired her) and all this talk/
happenings. agh. i need some kind of love whatever. i've got to feel sexy soon! ah! truly sexy, you know? truly warm inside and all! i don't know really. somehow straight-out or whatever kind of flattery and praise given to me these days make me feel good and more often than not more confident, but well, they just do not make the cut... it's tiring to be a (as Jessica Darling and cosmo had put it) 'highly orgasmic woman', i, being able to attain mental orgasms and well mini(?) orgasms or whatever they are and are called just by thinking, watching, and imagining circumstances or hot/beautiful/alluring/appealing people (or both haha). i think someone else, a some kind of marcus flutie-- my marcus flutie who is yet to be found and/or has not yet found me yet should give ME an orgasm. a MENTAL orgasm. or maybe even one of those other ooorrrgggaaaasssmmmmsss. haha. kidding!! right now i just want the mental one. anyway, point is, i need a hot/sexy/cute/whatever alluring boy who has and is ruled by a BRAIN. not by just his hormones and especially not just by his dick. a guy with an intelligent, witty, and interesting brain that brings about wonderful, alluring, mindblowing, and at the same time informative thoughts --something that will bring a sort of rich character or whatever, who'll be physically alluring, straight and interested in me. and who i'll be interested in as well... platonically.

and then maybe... hopefully even more than that.